I am going to start with the dream that I have waited to have since all these dreams began. Starting with my first, terrifying lucid dreams, and finally leading me to this point. A response from God, from Jesus Himself. Leading up to this dream I have struggled with many things, most importantly (and I knew this, but fighting it only continued my struggle with faith), is obedience. Is making the conscious choice, in every given circumstance, to avoid sin.
My visions was scanning over pages, written in English, though only several were legible. On the pieces of paper that scrolled up, down, left and right were drawings of a large complex of buildings. As the words were passing by me site these came into clear view, “on-fence” “commit” “sin…important” “frustrating” “enter the gate” “test…test…test”. As the final phrase was read, on the piece of paper it was written on, was a gate leading into a gating building that was very tall, and featured architecture not seen in our modern world, but was made of what seemed to be primitive materials. I was then looking at a stone doorway, and I heard a preacher speaking and he said, “The air of Christ fills many rooms, but there is no faith in Him.”
I cried out to Christ and spoke a prayer of committing my life to Him, and at this a great amount of evil was being ripped from my heart, following down my legs and out of my feet. Understand that ever since that day I lost my connection with God, my heart has been, I wouldn’t say “filled” with anything. It is the opposite of being filled, it is completely afflicted. I am in affliction, and have been for almost five years. Any and all progress to follow after, or even BELIEVE God wants me to, has been done so extremely strenuously, and painfully, and lonely.
This dream, this dream is the first dream in nearly 5 years that Jesus Himself has spoken to me. I have had demons, non-humans that looked human, fallen-angels and God serving ones speak to me. I’ve seen people made of burning coal, demons working drive-through with as many eyes as a fly. I’ve seen demons in hell. I’ve seen Satan himself 3 times. I’ve been lied to, I’ve had people offer me “a way out of this agony. A simple short-circuiting and it would be peaceful again.” I’ve heard Christ referred to as the “Fallen King”, and God the “Big Baby.” I’ve heard much, I’ve seen much, I’m learned much and now I’m going to share it all. I do it in hopes to bring light to the truth of God. The salvation found in His Son, and call placed on those calling themselves Christians to obedience in living as Christ. Not justifying sin because we’re “forgiven”, while also not purporting that salvation is gained through works. I hope that my words might help better explain God’s truth to those seeking it, and help them understand that we are less alive when we are awake, then we are when we sleep. Evil is real. God, and an absolute truth exist. I pray that all of the terror, and pain that I have suffered would in the end, be the refinement by fire that some are called. I pray that in my obedience of finally telling others of Christ, and His truth, that it would be the working out of the calling and reason placed on me by God. To Him be the glory, the Honor, and praise. Christ Jesus, you are my Savior, the King of Heaven, my mediator, my redeemer, my brother, my friend. God, you are all things good. For me to have taken for advantage the calling placed on me, to remain rebellious and knowingly walk in darkness, to never apply the gifts you have given me I ask forgiveness. I also pray that You would put into Your great use the great things of pain, and hurt, and questioning that sprung forth in my life. ALL things for the glory of God.
“Enter through the narrow gate. For wide is the gate and broad is the road that leads to destruction, and many enter through it.” Matthew 7:13
“”If you love me, you will obey what I command.” John 14:15
“This third I will bring into the fire; I will refine them like silver and test them like gold. They will call on my name and I will answer them; I will say, ‘They are my people,’ and they will say, ‘The LORD is our God.'” Zechariah 13:9
“No one, sir,” she said. “Then neither do I condemn you,” Jesus declared. “Go now and leave your life of sin.” John 8:11
“To this you were called, because Christ suffered for you, leaving you an example, that you should follow in his steps.” 1 Peter 2:21
“6 No one who lives in him keeps on sinning. No one who continues to sin has either seen him or known him.” 1 John 3